if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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