My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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