drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize