so that wasnt chicken after all
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
