I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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