I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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