she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
