dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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