How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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