what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
