Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
operation have a gay friend backfired
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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