I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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