stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize