Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
