We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
