So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
