Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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