Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
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I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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