ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
