They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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