It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Randomize
