Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize