Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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