Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
