Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
