Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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