the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize