u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize