Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Randomize
