Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize