My sheets look like a crime scene.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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