would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
