I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
