If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
home. puking in laundry basket.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Randomize
