He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize