it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
