This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
