She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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