I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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