Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
