she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
