There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
did you just send me my own nude
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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