I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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