she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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