Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize