what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
