Where are you?
In a non slutty way
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
