you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
