He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Is it penis luge time yet?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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