Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Moan for me like Helen Keller
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
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If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
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When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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